I never made a promise to blog daily, but I was hoping to sit down and write a line or two at least once a day. With how crazy the last couple of days have been (sick kid, work, etc) I wasn’t able to even open my computer. And for that I feel a little guilty, but I assure you things are still right on track.
This is Day 4 of Weight Watchers and day four of curbing my eating patterns. More than once I’ve been tempted to reach for a candy bar, extra soda or bag of chips (among other options which are kept in my household), but each time I have resisted. The times I haven’t resisted have been carefully calculated and added to my daily totals. Although I have guiltlessly tapped into my weekly extra allowed points, after all they are there for a reason, I haven’t gone overboard even once. And as this is my first week, I don’t think using the extra points makes me the worst participant in the world!
But anyway, back to the real topic at hand here and a topic that has irked me for a very very long time. My irritation with this topic goes back to high school when I was athletic and fit and my sister was overweight. Not only was she overweight, but she put little effort into wanting to dress well or take care of her outward appearance. So when opportunities arose to put on our “Sunday Best” or go to a school dance, I was the one that helped her find something that not only fit her well, but made her feel good.
I remember once such instance in high school when we needed to have an outfit to wear for a family gathering. The discussion between me and her took a dramatic turn when she said to me “well lets just go to Target or Walmart or something, I know they have clothes that’ll fit me. I doubt we’ll find anything trendy somewhere else.” To that I told her “moo moos are not allowed.”
Now before I get hate mail about the clothing sold at Walmart or Target, this is absolutely not bashing the clothing lines they carry or a debate about expensive vs inexpensive options. No, this is a debate about people (small or wide) that dress themselves in bags just because of the perception that those items are the ONLY articles of clothing that will fit their body. On the same side, squeezing into a sausage casing with rolls hanging over the top and out the side is equally unattractive and unnecessary. In this day and age there is no reason why anyone of either gender or any body type should dress in clothing “just because it’s the only option.” If you want to squeeze into something and don’t mind the feel, then all the more power to you. If a sack is the most comfortable thing and that’s what you want then go for it, but don’t tell me that you have to buy a moo moo just because it’s all your size allows. It’s not true.
As I gained weight I had to do a lot of adjusting in what I wore. No longer were some patterns or colors the most flattering on me (perhaps that’s just my own perception as well). Not only that, but the type of pants I wore and the shirts I selected all had to be re-thought so that I chose the option that would be the most flattering. It wasn’t that I couldn’t wear what I wore before, but those items no longer fit my body properly. I may have gained weight, and yes my self-esteem lowered, but I could still dress myself and look good in the clothes that fit my body.
Now with that being said, although I choose clothes that fit my rotund body to the best of clothing’s ability, I still don’t like the overall effect. I don’t like that I’m now that large girl in the photographs or that when I look in the mirror I don’t really recognize myself. So that’s why, despite having an eye for oversized fashion (apparently), it’s time to lose the fat and get back into those skinny jeans. Hell, I’d be happy to get back into those normal-sized jeans again.
As the days pass I’m able to work on what I really want to do while on this weight-loss journey. There’s decisions about wearing trackers like a pedometer or having a “skip day” or posting photos about my progress. I even need to decide whether to weigh in daily, every other day, once a week or once a month. And to be honest, I’m still not sure about any of those choices. When I lost weight last time I weighed in daily, but I became obsessed with the number and would analyze what the scale said to the tenth of a pound. I don’t think I want to do that this time. I think I want to make this truly about changing my lifestyle with the weight loss being the ultimate bonus. As for the tracker, I’ve been considering a Fit bit, any thoughts? I guess I’ll have to make some of the decisions as I go, but consistency is key so eventually I’ll get a good pattern created. I haven’t weighed myself since the day I started, and I’m not ready to do it yet because I truly think it’s too soon to worry about the numbers. Right now I’m busy worrying about restraint and self-control. Hmmm, but what about that skip day thing?
Today is the NCAA March Madness game with my Wisconsin Badgers playing Oregon. And the Wisconsin Badgers are in the Big 10 championship game in hockey and those are both reasons to pull out the wings and chips! I think i’ll stick to the snacks I laid out for today instead. Just pass me some fruit and my Special K popcorn chips …. I’ll splurge on that Coke though!